Monday, 17 January 2011

FEAR/The Big Apple


That's what fear's like, isn't it? You know how it's all you can hear in your ears, it's all you can see behind your eyes and feel in your limbs? 

I used to describe myself, pretentious as it sounds, as phobia-centric. Basically, I spent the vast majority of 2003-mid 2010 in near constant fear; of social situations, of the future, of dogs, of heights, of people, of sex, of public speaking, and so on.

This painting is called "The Nightmare" but I think it adequately summarises what fear is like, don't you agree?

Fun phobic fact: for the first few weeks at Tesco, I couldn't actually find the courage to say hi to any of my customers. I didn't know how to approach it. I'd spend 8 hours wondering how to greet the next person in line. It was a total nightmare.

For want of a better way to put it, I "grew out" of most of my fears. Not that it wasn't a struggle, but I've mostly made it.

Except heights. I'm still absolutely terrified of heights.

Which is going to make a few aspects of my forthcoming New York trip (AHIFJSAKLJFBGAHHDKJNABDYEAHHH!) ...interesting!

I don't like flying!

It's mostly take-off I have the issue with though, so I'll just have to suck it up for a few minutes until we're airborne.

I'm also a little bit worried about this view: AKA the top of the Empire State building. Er, it's quite high up. I definitely won't feel comfortable going up in a lift. And stairs seem a little bit...unfeasible. 
Again, I'm just going to have to deal with it. This is the trip of a lifetime and I'm not going to let a stupid childhood fear get in my way!


What are your fears...and have you ever had to overcome them?


OH AND P.S, I'd still appreciate advice on how to get my vlog uploaded! Bastarding thing.


Jen in the Purple Pants said...

I hate takeoff too!!!!!! Last month when I was flying I almost pooped my pants (not really thank goodness :D) I was so scared during take off!!! But NYC is so worth it!!!! Walking up the Empire State building isn't even an option so don't worry :D I hate heights too but the view is worth it!! The elevator ride is the worst part, but once you get up top it's amazing!!!
I'm so excited for you to see NY!!!! It's my all time favorite city!!!

Savannah Burton said...

You are so lucky! I wish I were preparing for a trip to NEW YORK! I really want to go to fashion week! :-)

Gemma said...

I recommend going to the top of the Rockefeller building instead because you can see so much more...including the Empire State building.


Aoife. said...

I suppose I'm weird (what else's new?) but I love take-off. But I do have some other fears, some quite shallow-teenage-girl type things like being the friend everyone secretly hates and some are quite average like being in an accident. Or getting really fat. Or being bullied.
Anyways!! Good luck for NYC! ♥

Audrey (hkittygirl) said...

I hate going on planes because I always get massive headaches on them. T^T

I'm afraid of loosing people, mostly friends, I guess...