SINCE WHEN DO I HAVE 6 FOLLOWERS?

I do not understand.
Oh, one of them is me, of course. But the other 5 of you...hi, when did you all appear?

(Don't laugh at me for having such a pitiful amount of followers. Actually, you can if you want since it is pretty bad.)

Secret: I can be really annoying.

Anyway, shall I do a round-up of how things are going for me?

Since we last spoke *checks* I've read Great Expectations, Keep the Aspidistra Flying, Tess of the d'Urbervilles, The Mill on the Floss and I'm halfway through All Quiet on the Western Front; hopefully I'm going to finish that tonight.

I've acquired a stalker, he's half-Turkish, ugly and fucking creepy; hopefully he'll get the picture after I've ignored every text and fb message he's sent me this week.

I've done approximately TWENTY BAZILLION HOURS of dance in preparation for a show, a competition AND an exam, and discovered the costumes for the competition are...absolutely foul, if I'm honest. Well no, they're pretty attractive if you're built like a rake, but I am not shaped for stretchy lycra hotpant leotard bajingos, okay?

It's like this but not.

Not that I'm fat. I feel the need to add that. I just have big boobs.
(Apologies, new-ish followers. I don't have an off switch.)

"Actually, that's a lie, I'm never going to look like Keira Knightley, because my boobs are roughly the size of her head."

April this year, see what I mean? 

I've discovered that, based on a tariff score of 300, I've actually already got into my 5th choice uni without having to take my final year exams. SCORE. 

Oh yeah, I've snuck some school-work in there too. I'm a regular Maggie Tulliver check out my literary references, Cambridge, you want me yeah!!

And that's all I really have to say. Except essential blog maintenance, I SOLEMNLY SWEAR that I am up to no good that I will change my header so it isn't so square and ugly, AND write a post about classical music that I ACTUALLY LIKE, and do something else interesting by the end of the week.

Insert obligatory blog-end question here. Tell me about your life if you like.

Cheers :)

Emma x