Dear Everyone

Today I was a bitch.
I called my mom a fxcking whore.

That is not something I do.

What the hell is wrong with me?

Reasons I am Insane

Number one: I am actually listening to a song by SELENA EFFING GOMEZ, and kind of enjoying it as a one off experience.

You are the thunder
and I am the lightening

Anyway, annoying teen stars aside, there are is another reason I am stark raving bonkers.

I have committed to writing a 50,000 word novel for my extended project qualification. Have I ever written over 25,000 words? No. Am I insane? Completely.

Oh man, just kill me now.

"Sir's on his nosebleed." - A Pearl of Wisdom

TRY: Never try to deny your emotions to yourself. You know they're there. By pretending they're not you're just hindering your own perception of the world.

Always, always, always listen to what you're feeling. Please.

CATCH: This does not apply at certain times of the month. You know what I mean. Because then your emotions are just ridiculous.

Seriously, I'm up and down like an elevator. I think I'm going to do an Alice in Wonderland and two-time red bull and sedatives until I get the right balance.

Alternatively, vodka red bull. Depressant + antidepressant = eh? How does that even work?

Did I get tagged? No.
Do I care? NO!

1. What is your current obsession? Nude tones.

2. What are you wearing today? Black opaque tights, high waisted black skirt, breton striped vest, black cardie, gold necklace thing.

3. What’s for dinner? I had smoky chicken casserole = chicken, chorizo, chickpeas and bacon in rice. Yum.

4. What’s the last thing you bought? Er....some toast this morning, except it was a freebie. God I love the dinner ladies.

5. What are you listening to right now? Something politicy on the TV. Ah, it's the news.

6. What do you think about the person who tagged you? *whistles*

7. If you could have a house totally paid for, fully furnished anywhere in the world, where would you like it to be? London. Honestly. In Mayfair or something.

8. One thing you want to change about yourself ? Jelly belly!

9. If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go? Bed. Seriously. Or maybe back to Rome.

10. Which language do you want to learn? Spanish and Italian! I'm trying.

11. What’s your favourite quote?
"Even after all this time the sun never says to the earth,
"You owe me."
Look what happens with a love like that, it lights the whole sky.
- Hafiz "

- This wasn't me but it's beaut. Personally? It's not original but "que sera, sera" pretty much sums it up.

12 . Would you cook for me? Trust me, you don't want me to.

13. What is the right way to avoid people who purposefully hurt you? Be civil, but don't get drawn in to proper conversation.

14. What are you afraid of the most? Heights and failure.

15. Who do you want to meet right now? The One. So sue me, I'm a closet romantic ^^

16. What is your favourite colour? Green, purple.

17. Give us 3 styling tips that work for you. "Does this match? Ah, screw it, I'll wear it anyway"; plus the tight top or tight bottom, never both rule and dressing to match your shape.

18. What is your dream job? Novelista extraordinaire. *snorts* In the real world, editor of something.

19. What’s your favourite magazine? Glamour!! Or Company, but it's shorter.

20. If you had $100 now, what would you spend it on? Books, CDs, necklaces and junk. Actually, I do have $100 right now but I'm saving.

21. What do you consider a fashion faux pas? Jeggings. I don't care if they're fashionable, BLECH.

22. What's your favourite thing to eat? Paella and chocolate.

23. What brings a smile on your face instantly? People. They make me smile, they make me frown, they...make the rockin' world go round?

24. A word that you say a lot? "And I was like...and then she was like..."

25. What kind of haircut do you prefer? Kind of...hanging about.

26. What are you going to do after this? Finish off my quiz for the Y7s, then an essay on "les nouvelles medias" and then a history essay. All due in tomorrow! :)

27. What do you do when you are feeling low or terribly depressed? Write incoherent rants in notebooks, depressing catchphrases on my walls, then paint my nails.

28. What makes you go wild? Rawr...er...idk.

29. What are your favourite movies? Slumdog Millionaire!

30. What inspires you? Other people's books, things people say and random concepts and juxtapositions of feelings that make me go "hmm, what if-?"

31. What do your friends call you most commonly? Nems, Oomar, Emmy or Nemesis. Some people even call me Emma.

32. Would you prefer coffee or tea? Yuck, neither.

33. Which other blogs do you love visiting? A lot!

34. Favorite Dessert/Sweet? Blondies that I make, ice cream, Muller Light yoghurts, anything my little sister makes..

35. How many tabs are turned on in your browser right now? Three - blogger, youtube, facebook.

36. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought? I genuinely haven't looked in a mirror today. Oh except to do my quiff, when I thought "Huh, my quiff is working good today."

37. Favourite Season? Spring! I love this time of year.

38.One wish that you really want to see it come true? I want kids so badly.

39. What breaks your heart? Othello's final speech before he dies, Fang's letter to Max in the new MR book, and something I wrote once that was so beautiful I just sat there and cried. And when my mom cries.

40. What's one thing you really want to do in life? Just...not fail, okay? That so hard?
41. What colour is your bra? Flesh. Boring or what. It's my exercise bra.

HEY SOUL SISTER?!

^ love this song. Hate the first lines though, ewww lipstick on the brain.

Why the nerds do it best.

When I'm down and feelin' blue
I close my eyes so I can be with you
Oh, baby, be strong for me
Baby, belong to me
Help me through
Help me need you

You know how awesome Glee is, right? Well I'd like to chat to you about Camp Hill Girl's school's answer to Glee Club, the magical, wonderful, awesomeness of Show Choir.
March 18-19th was the annual Songs from the Shows (or SFTS for the cool kidz) in which 90-odd kids took to the stage and sang their little heartsicles out to songs from Fame! and Mamma Mia.

As a Y12, I am a good year too old for Show Choir. And you wouldn't believe how gutted I am about that, having been in it since the very beginning, the birth of the Show Choir concert. But I've successfully moved backstage and between choreography, drama direction and the all important ticket sales (every break and lunch, for two weeks) and I don't think I've ever had so much fun at a concert - dancing and singing along like total loonies and gatecrashing the stage at the end ;)

I'm so proud of them all, y'know. I feel like they're my children, no joke. Especially the drama extract kids, I literally feel like they're my babies.

And my sister (she of the Performing Arts specialism with their own theatre) is jealous of the Glee club. Although, as she put it "they aren't exactly the cool kids are they?"
They aren't. But hey, a show choir in a nerd school, what do you expect?

So I'm mildly elated.
Woo.

Gypsy

'Cause I'm a gypsy Are you coming with me? I might steal your clothes And wear them if they fit me
I never made agreements Just like a gypsy And I won't back down 'Cause life's already bit me And I won't cry I'm too young to die If you're gonna quit me 'Cause I'm a gypsy

Part one: Disclaimer
I'm not a gypsy
Part two: Relevance

I really like this song. It's cute. Plus the guy in the video PHWOAR.
Anyway, the actual deeper relevance I'm getting into is how much holiday'ing I have in the year, when a year is a Tesco Year which starts in February.
Rome, Feb 11th 2010:Easily one of the most magical cities I've ever visited; I actually stood in the collosseum and said "[friend], I am so confused right now. People shouldn't be allowed in places like this because it scrambles their brains."

And then I went to McDonalds.
I look mildly dubious here but rest assured I do LOVE ROMA.

So the rest of my gypsy-ing is:
Montpellier, July 2010
Fillievres, July 2010
New York, Feb 2011

I AM SO EXCITED.

HERE COMES THE SUN,

nananana.

I hate to get all Brit-ski and weather obsessed on you, but JESUS it's good weather today. I just walked the dog. IN A SKIRT.

And then the downer: I got a C in my History mock, a borderline C in my English mock and I'm failing Computing.
This from the girl who got all A* at GCSE.
GAH.

all of the stars, are fading away...

So this blogpost begins about 2, maybe even 3 days ago when we were walking my cousin (brief biography: born in Birmingham, now lives in the Cotswolds with all the rich people and the farmers) home to his grandma's for the night.

With the dog, but that's a pretty irrelevant part to the story.

Anyway, as I am wont to when I am walking the dog with my sister, and in this case my cousin too, I began to blather on about how pretty the stars were, and how I always always notice Orion before anything else, and my countryside cousin informs me "You think these are pretty? You should see the stars in [where he lives], this is nothing."

So where was I going with this? Mostly I was wondering what I miss out on, being a city-girl and all. Yeah, there are benefits to where I love: mostly, urban dreams-type chillin', great shopping, sky scrapers, crowds...the usual. But things it would appear I'm missing out on - stars, barn parties (I'm not joking. Talk about countryside.) and long walks with my dog...maybe even the ol' village atmosphere, who knows?

Extrapolating a vague moral out of this: there are good things everywhere and no matter where you get born and end up being, there's beauty everywhere you look. Are we happy?

P.S. Speaking of long walks with Little D, I happen to have pulled most of the small of my back and I can't move and IT HURTS :(

Watching the Oscars

I know it's late. Whatever.
Anyway, I was watching the deaths-this-year-montage (and crying, don't laugh at me) and this lady came up:Nobody told me she was dead!
RIP is all I can say.

Seriously, I think she might just have been the epitome of beauty.

(Kathryn Grayson, of Showboat and Kiss Me Kate, by the way.)

I LIKE

This advert.



Highly cute. I wish I knew what the song was called :/

Emma x

FOOD

Credit @Sabine Davis on Flickr - http://www.flickr.com/photos/eleganceisrefusal/3180878280/

This is the interesting chronicle of my eating disorder.

I use that term quite loosely, eating disorder, because obviously I don't mean a medical disorder. Believe me, that's not something I'd ever take lightly; what I mean is that it's something out-of-order, ab-orderly, about my eating habits.
I appear to have got myself in a linguistic knot, shall I start again?

This is the interesting chronicle of my eating habits.

Point uno: I spend most of my life thinking about my next meal.
Point dos: I can sit down for a meal and eat a hundred thousand portions without getting full.
Point tres: I can go an entire day without eating, until about half 5.
So how does it work? I just don't eat in the day, and that offsets my extremely unhealthy binges in the night. HOWEVER, it's a pretty precarious position - should I happen to have change in my purse, the vending machine beckoneth, and then I eat early, and that is known as a fat day.

The point is, why can't human beings have healthy attitudes to eating? Specifically girls. I'm guessing modern media, because I know probably 3 people in my friendship group who actually eat properly. The rest can be divided into:

a) junk eaters who will regret it when their metabolism matches their appetite
b) anorexics
c) health food addictsd) "I don't eat" people (slightly different as not medically dangerous)

I really do think it's modern media, you know. I have no idea if I'm fat, thin or average because my comparison point is...i dunno, Keira Knightley or someone.

That's a lie, I'm never going to look like Keira Knightley because my boobs are the size of her head. And the amount I eat, I'm never going to reach her skinniness levels either, do I even want to? I don't know.

What was my conclusion? Oh yeah. Young girls these days. Fucked.

Emma x

There's nothing on the TV,

nothing on the radio,
that means that much to me,
nothing on the tv, nothing on the radio,
that I can believe in.












I love Razorlight, truly-dooly. However, that is not what this post is on, in fact it's on Chris Brown and Crawl. I've been watching the UK top 40 (because as I said in lyric form, there's nothing on the TV, although I haven't checked the radio) and Chris Brown is back. This may be old news, I don't know.

The unfortunate thing is that I actually really like the song.

If we crawl
'till we can walk again
And we'll run
Until we're strong enough to jump
And we'll fly
Until there is no end.

Mostly just the chorus, the rest is pretty rubbish. Anyway, the point is that I feel bad liking it after what he did to Rihanna. Is this something that the public is really willing to forget? I mean, I don't know the whole story behind it - oh to be a fly on the wall - but I can't see it any other way than a man hitting his girlfriend, and I honestly believe that that is ALWAYS wrong. Always. Period. And I'm pretty flexible with my morals.

I'll tell you what else bugs me (brief distraction - *ooh*, fireflies is on!) is the video. Have you seen the girl? Mega-star, hair shaved on one side of her head, remind you of anyone? Now, there's meekly creeping back into the limelight and releasing a serious-type ballad so people will see your contriteness, contrition?, but this is basically capitalizing on the whole scenario! That's just wrong. What, you expect us to forgive you because you're wearing nerd glasses and need to learn how to walk? I'm sorry but no. Absolutely no.

But...I do quite like the song...


Over and out,

Emma x

Also, just while I'm here:

Alot of you will have already seen this, but here's a picture that made me go aww, even though I'm not exactly their biggest fan:





















And there you have 3/4 Beatles, aged about 15 I think, and a random in the corner who clearly should have stuck with them for longer :)

I don't know why, but I really love this photo.

I also have another blog planned which makes a change. Maybe tomorrow, maybe later.

Eventide

How are things? I bet things are good, because my things are good.

I have a shedload of work at the moment, but fingers and toes crossed things won't be too terrible for much longer.

Anyway, here is my life in pictures.
1. WATCHING
I haven't seen Terminator 1, but this is looking like the kind of film I enjoy - nonsensical, man talking in funny accent, bullets and explosions, car chases, no plot whatsoever.
The perfect antidote to the all-thinking, serious being I am supposed to be coming.
Oooh, gory death. I like where this is going.

2. The Stress List

There are a few things I find a little stressy atm. I will make a list but it will be short so you don't get distressed.

a)

Computing coursework is the biggest, fattest FML of my life.

b) Uni applications, senior prefect team, work experience, being a good student. Lalala.














c) Tesco is a twat. A big, fresh foods bastard. Gah.







3) NOW FOR THE HAPPY LIST TO MAKE YOU ALL HAPPY.

Computing is nearly over, I am a semi-genius, I love my friends and I love chocolate. Woo woo woo.


So that's the monday evening round up. Good night and thankyou for joining us.